Dieing is part of living

At least that is what my mother says. Meme died on Tuesday. The day after Valentine's. The day before Notorious was born. I already have a new story to tell her. Although I suppose she already knows seeing as she can see it all from heaven's gates. I want to tell her about how Bahbetsie dips her little head down when I go to put a hairbow in her hair. She would love that. Oh how she loved my little sweet baby girl. 10 months is all we got to share with her but you know, after losing Eddie, I got a taste of the connection we have to the spirit realm and even though it is not in the Bible or explainable, I saw more and experienced more after he died and so I know she can see and knows. She must be having so much fun up there with Papa and Eddie and her mama and daddy. And her own brother. Wow. Makes me kind of excited about heaven.
I have very few words right now...just thinking and processing her loss and getting ready to be with my family for a few days. Celebrating the glory of all that she was to all of us.
I know I was her favorite. I know she knew I loved her so deep. We were kindred spirits. She understood me and how I thought. She was proud of my husband, the way I teach my children to obey, our love for Jesus and the Body of Christ. She valued my authentic life with my faults and God's forgiveness. I am so glad I know all of those things. She taught me how to cook her favorite recipes just like she did. We have worked tirelessly through the holidays for the last five years or so teaching me how to get it just right. Grammy cookies. Red velvet cake. Her dressing. And this Christmas, she taught me her chocolate pies. I got all of her I needed to carry on her legacy. I soaked it in. I was thankful for every good day. I Carpe Diem'ed.
It felt good to say goodbye. Share my heart. Make her some promises. Just two weeks before she crossed over.
I have no regrets...